Good evening. This is paul bedford with the news. As you know, our news is the most modern, up-to-date news possible. Even i have not as yet seen the news. The news coming directly from a news machine here in our studio. And as we go on the air, we take the news from the machine and present it to you.
thus, you get the news as it happens. And now, here’s the news. [laughter] ; [laughter] ; we’re experiencing a little bit of difficulty with the news machine here as we go on the air, but i’m sure our technicians are working on it now and they’ll have it cleared up in a matter of moments.
isn’t that right, george? In the meantime, [laughter] excuse me. [laughter] oh, i see. We seem to have cleared up the difficulty. So now here is the news. The news machine is broken. [applause and cheering] [laughter] thank you for that news, george. [laughter] well, we have a moment here. Why don’t we take a look at the weather picture? And now, here’s your local weatherman, don rumb.
don, how’s the weather look? Don returns from his vacation on monday. ; sure be glad to see him back. [laughter] oh, i see we’ve evidently cleared up the difficulty again. So, now we’re continuing with the news. Well, the governor is back in the news tonight. Governor says it will definitely be another tax hike. When asked just how much of a tax hike, the governor stated it will probably be in the area of [laughter] [laughter] thank you, george.
Oh, continuing now with more news. Oh, sports. See, we have some sports scores coming in. Here are the sports scores. 2:1, 3 to 5, and 8-2. [laughter] [laughter] oh, the 8 to2 is a final. Mhm. Oh, more news now. Here’s the news. Do the commercial, stupid. [laughter] why don’t we pause now in the news and watch this film commercial from britain realy? [laughter] ; [laughter]
[laughter] ; i’m dying out here, baby. Come on, man. It’s rating week. [laughter] a look in the bottom drawer. Remember, they have three convenient locations. [laughter] well, now we move on with our news show. A rather popular part of the show where you, the listener, get an opportunity to call in and ask me any question at all you have about the news.
remember the number is crestview 67399. Just call in and ask me any question at all pertaining to the news. Glad to answer the question here on newsline. Call in now. [laughter] that number again. Presview 67399. The lines are tied up at first. Keep trying. [laughter] six operators on duty. [cheering] [applause] ; [laughter] [laughter]
; oh, there’s a call coming in now. Hello. Yes, news line. yes, go ahead. Eggs, butter, [laughter] loaf of bread. Uh, who is this, please? [laughter] well, look, honey. I’m on the air. Yeah. No, right. Yeah, right now. Uh-huh. Well, i i can’t i have it. Yeah, the eggs better, but bread. Yeah, right.
Goodbye. Huh? Well, no, i can’t. Well, we’re on the air. Well, it’s just all right. poopsy whoopsie loves you, too. Well, i see the old clock on the wall says it’s 6:30. ; we’ll be moving along. And remember, this is paul bedford saying no news is good news. [applause] guess who? ; oh, hi skyler.
; hi, sis. [laughter] where’s your boyfriend? I thought he was supposed to meet dad today. ; oh, you mean donald? Well, he had to go to the doctor, skyler, but he should be here any minute. ; well, i certainly hope he meets with dad’s approval, bobo. You know how strict dad is about who marries into the family.
; i know. Daddy never even approved of mother. ; yeah. Right up to the end. He buried her under her maiden name. ; that’s sick, skyler. ; well, cheers. ; oh, gee. I sure hope daddy likes donald. I’ll never get married. After all, i’m not as lucky as you are, skyler. I’m plain and you’re handsome. ; that’s not true, bobo.
i’m extremely handsome. [laughter] look, ; you’ve got everything in the world a woman wants. You’ve got long eyelashes, a beautiful face, and a gorgeous figure. ; yes, i know. I take after my uncle herman. He was a ziggfeld f’s girl. [laughter] ; thick. ; well, chin up, bobo. ; bobo? I’m more a boo boo than a bobo. ; well, i’ll see you later.
i have to go to the beauty parlor. ; whatever for ; to make a donation. Oh, ; mr. Donald crowley is here. ; oh, send him right in. ; so hard to get ugly help. ; oh, donald, dear. Oh, hello, sweetheart. Come over here and sit down. How are you? How did the allergy test go? ; oh, just fine. Just fine. Yeah, today i i had tests for pollen and wool and cat fur.
; cat fur? Yeah, ; cat fur. My goodness. They’re certainly thorough, aren’t they? ; yeah, they sure are. ; well, how do you feel? ; well, i don’t know yet. You know, i you know, having the test and everything, i i think i might have a reaction to it. I’m not sure. They said i might. ; i hope not, donald.
i am so nervous about your meeting my daddy for the first time. Now, what’s there to be nervous about for crying out loud? It doesn’t bother me. ; it’s going to be all right. [laughter] ; what’ you say? ; i said it’s going to be all right. ; before that, ; i i said it doesn’t bother me. ; oh, well, i sure hope nothing happens to upset daddy.
; what could possibly happen for crying out loud? You’re always ; donald. [laughter] ; well, now you see that’s what i was talking about having a reaction. Now, i just had an uncontrollable urge to lick my hand. ; well, please don’t do it while my father’s around. [laughter] ; don’t worry for crying out loud.
; stop it, donald. Now, look, i i i’ll go get daddy. You just sit there. Okay. [laughter] ; now, see, there i go again. I’m trying. I think i’m having a reaction to those tasks. ; well, donald, please. You’ve got to try to control yourself. I don’t want daddy to see that. Now, get down out of the chair. ; don’t get down, donald.
; [laughter] ; what’s the matter with you? ; what? ; i think i’m shedding. ; oh, god. Please. Now, [laughter] don’t do ; daddy. Hello, daddy. Uh, ; uh, donald, this this is daddy. Daddy, this is donald, my fiance. ; what’ you do? [laughter] bubble. ; yes, daddy. ; there’s a lot to be said for being an old may.
[laughter] ; oh, sit down. [laughter] ; so, you want to marry my daughter? ; yes, sir. Yes, sir. I do, sir. [laughter] you want to marry that? ; i do. I do. ; young man, i suppose you realize that it’s very important to me about who marries into my family. ; oh, donald knows all about that, daddy. ; we we’ve discussed it quite [laughter] ; i think i got fleas.
; donald’s a great tennis player, dad. ; yes, he did. ; [laughter] ; but he often gets these cicks in his neck. ; what was he doing? ; would you like a drink, daddy? ; yes, i’d like a drink of double. Yes, i’ll fit it at myself. Could you get me a glass of water? I think you have something stuck in my throat.
; what’s in your throat? ; a furball. [laughter] ; poor donald. ; oh, thank you. [laughter] mr. Cwley, sit down. I’d like to have a talk with you. ; now, mr. Cwley, like a serious word with you. Now, you may not be familiar with one’s pride and one’s family name, but my ancestors come from very select stuff.
as a matter of fact, they come they go back all the way back to the mayflower. [laughter] as a matter of fact, we the are acknowledged leaders of the 400. As a matter of fact, i would say we represent the epitome of aristocratic tradition. [laughter] [laughter] and that’s why i say to raleigh that i would like to see any son-in-law of mine take his place in society alongside of me.
[laughter] ; yes, daddy. ; i’d like to speak to you alone, manto man. ; yes, daddy. Donald. ; donald, would you wait in the next room while i talk to donald? ; here, donald. Donald, wait in the next room while i talk to d. Oh, [laughter] ; daddy. Daddy, please. He he doesn’t usually behave like this. Honest.
he doesn’t. He’s just got some kind of a strange reaction to these allergy tests he’s been having. Daddy, really? He’s a wonderful person. Oh, daddy, please. You always said you wanted a grandson. ; i suppose you’ll give me pick of the litter. [laughter] ; daddy, please. Just this once for me. ; all right. All right. For your sake.
; it’s all right. ; it’s all right. Boo boo. ; donald. Donald. Hey. Do. [laughter] ; all right. That was real fun. I’ve never played with yarn before. ; yes. Yes. That’s all right. I just take the yarn away. Now just sit down, mr. Cwley. Let’s everyone sit down and let’s have a nice calm little mature talk.
sit down, mr. Crawley. ; [laughter] [applause] [applause] ; mr. Crowley, would you mind sitting over there? ; oh, i’m sorry. ; uh, mr. Crowley, on the paper. I’m sure that everything’s going to be all right, mr. Crowley. ; yes. Yes. I’m positive, sir. ; donald, [laughter] i have the best news in the world.
daddy said that it was all right for you and me to get married. ; oh, thank you, sir. That’s great news. Really, it is. I don’t know what’s happening here to me, sir, but i i assure you that i’m just going to be as normal as ever, sir. It’s just temporary. ; i’m sure it will be, my boy. ; by the way, would you like to stay for dinner? ; oh, i’d love to.
; going in the dining room? ; we are. Oh, yeah. Well, you know, on second thought, i’m not too hungry. I think i’ll just go home and open a can of friskies. ; donald, please stay. ; well, no, not really. I’ve embarrassed you too much. I don’t know what’s come over me. But really, the next time i come through that door, i’m just going to be as normal as ever.
really? I hope so. Good night. ; good night. Thank you ; very much. ; well, congratulations, dr. Newberry, ; and congratulations to you, dr. Horick. ; well, what about me? ; and a special congratulations to you. ; here, here to dr. Percy thornhill, a man whose name will go down in medical history. ; gosh. ; here.
here. [laughter] ; i didn’t do anything. ; oh, no. Listen, uh, percy, all of us on the staff want to thank you for volunteering to help us find a cure for the swine flu. ; yes. ; you shouldn’t say you didn’t do anything. I mean, my goodness, taking all those experimental vaccine shots. ; my goodness, you must have had at least 50 of them. 52.
; i have so much medicine in me. You can’t kiss me without a prescription. ; percy, that’s very amusing. ; well, ; what ; shall we tell him? ; oh, yeah. Go ahead. Go on. Well, you tell him. Go ahead. ; percy and i are going to be married. ; what? ; yeah. ; why? That’s wonderful. When did all of this come about? ; oh, i don’t know.
i think i first fell in love with him just before i gave him his first shot. He looks so cute just standing there whimpering. ; oh, uh, excuse me a minute. I just remembered i got to put a coin in the parking meter. I don’t want to get a ticket out. ; all right, i’ll be right back. Okay, ; well, that is simply wonderful.
he’s such a fine young man. I’m sure the two of you are going to be very happy. ; i’m thrilled. ; where are you going to go on your honeymoon? ; well, percy and i have been talking about it and i want to go to hawaii, but he wants to visit his folks in chagrin falls. So, we made a compromise. ; so, we’re going to hawaii and we’re going to send his folks a telegram.
; i’m still surprised that percy volunteered for that program. You know, taking all of those swine flu experimental shots. ; i know. But, you know, the funny thing is he told me just the other day that he has never felt better in his life. ; but one thing’s for certain, you’ll never have to worry about getting the swine flu with all that vaccine in ; that is for sure.
; oh, boy. That was close. Excuse me. Excuse me. Boy, he was just about ready to give me a ticket. ; he was. And you got there just corner in there. What h what happened? Well, nothing. Uh, this cop just came up to me and he just looked me in the face. He said, “uh, welcome to the club.” and kind of shook my hand and went away.
Percy, you ; do you feel all right? ; yeah. Why? ; no, nothing. You you look fine. You look great. ; yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You look fine. You look you look just fine, porky. Percy. ; well, gosh. Uh did uh ; did you uh tell the doc about us uh going on a honeymoon? ; yes. Uh yes. Yes. We’re going to hawaii. Hawaii.
; hawaii. Going to hawaii. That’s ; i can hardly wait for the luau. I ; have you folks decided on lunch yet? I have lost my appetite. What about you, margaret? ; no, no, thank you. I’ve been eating like a pig lately. I’ve been ; how about your pet here? ; i beg your pardon. ; oh, now listen. Don’t get sore, mister.
You should see some of the guys i go out with. ; what will it be? ; oh, i don’t know. Well, you guys aren’t going to eat. I guess i’ll just have oh, a bushel of corn will be fine, i guess. ; fine. You want that on a plate or in a trough? Just bring it. Bring it. ; that’s kind of weird. I don’t know why i ordered corn.
i normally don’t like corn. ; so, the two of you were going to get married, huh? ; yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That’s right. ; yeah. I’ll tell you, when i told margaret we were going to be married, gosh, she said yes. I was just in hog heaven. What what about the children? Have you discussed having a family? ; oh, we sure did. Yeah.
yeah. Yeah, we sure did. We have old literary kids. ; i love those little games they played. It’s just so cute. ; like this little piggy went to market. ; i’m afraid i don’t know that one. ; dr. Horlick, i think we’d better tell him. ; no. Why? Why don’t we just give him a note and get out of here? ; no. No. We bet. Percy, just look.
look, percy. ; what? ; look. ; so, it’s a picture of a pig. Percy, that’s a mirror. ; a mirror? Well, that can’t be a mirror. That’s mean. ; percy, please take it easy. Just this is just a temporary side effect from all of that that vaccine. The swine flu vaccine. ; percy, the doctor’s right. ; i don’t understand what you’re talking about.
; ursy pay, the after day is it? That’s pay at less pay. This is just fine. Yeah, sure. Just great. Me going around looking like this. ; i mean, this isn’t going to affect my career too much, is it? I mean, after all, being a plastic surgeon, huh? ; well, i’m sorry, sir. We’re all out of coin.
how about some nice pickled pigs feet? ; very funny. What? ; some ickled pay, igs pay, you say. [laughter] ; it’s not anybody care for another snort. Two of these and make him doubles. ; all right. How about paul newman? ; yeah. I’ll just have a triple martini, please. ; you want that with an olive, a twist, or a head of lettuce? ; will you just bring [laughter] the pink drink? ; okay. All right.
; oh boy, this is just great. I can’t let people see me like this. What am i supposed to do anyway? Huh? Look, they don’t worry about it. This is simply a counter reaction of the metabolism hormones which have completely reversed the chromosome field. ; oh yeah, sure. Yeah. What is that supposed to mean? Why don’t you wear a paper bag over your head? Just great.
yeah, ; percy. Percy. ; well, i suppose a wedding’s off. I mean, after all, what kind of girl is going to marry a guy with a pig face? ; oh, percy. Percy, believe me, beauty is only skin deep. ; and you marry me anyway? ; no way. Well, i guess i better be going. Well, where where you going? ; well, i want to get home.
there’s a big rain coming tonight, and i don’t i don’t want to miss the mudslide. ; percy, i guess i was a bit hard on ; margaret. That’s percy’s glass. ; oh, i’m sorry. I’m just so upset. I don’t know what’s come over me. ; on second thought, you you you you might reconsider marrying him, margaret. ; i should. ; yes, definitely.
that the two of you would make an ideal couple. What makes you stop it, stanley. You’re an animal. ; stop it, stanley. You’re an [screaming] animal. ; um, carol, ; huh? ; would you mind a little constructive criticism? ; no, of course not. That was rotten. ; you can do it better. Of course. All right. Be my guest. ; well, stop telling you [screaming] [laughter]
Now. You know why you’re painting scenery. I feel better. You know, this whole thing is pretty ridiculous. Anyway, my being in a street car named desire, i wouldn’t even be doing it if roger wasn’t directing it. ; that’s for sure. ; hey, what are you doing here? You’re supposed to be over at the theater painting scenery.
; i’m on my way. ; well, snap to it. I’ve got to get that scenery done. I got a show to put on. ; yo, mine fure. ; did you know this whole community theater project is really dumb? ; oh, honey, this can mean a lot to me. The president of the country club has made this his pet project. It’s a prestige thing.
; big deal. Oh, by the way, george perkins is on his way over here to rehearse with you. ; who’s george perkins? ; george perkins? He’s a he’s a golfing buddy of mine. I cast him in the part of stanley. You know, the marlon brando part. ; is he sexy? ; well, not exactly. ; what do you mean not exactly? ; well, uh, it it’s all in the acting.
He’ll get it. It’s right in the act. That must be him. [bell] [applause] hello. ; i’m george perkins. ; boy, you must be one heck of an actor. ; oh, hi george. How are you? Glad you could come. We got a lot of work to do. Oh, this is my wife, carol. Oh, how do you do? Very nice to meet you. Yes. Oh, you’ll be playing the part of stella.
; yes. ; i’ll be playing the part of stanley. ; it’s the part that marlon brando played in the movie. I won’t be playing it exactly like marlon brando. ; no kidding, mr. Perkins. ; yeah, it’s uh i have my own version. It’s called the perkins version in school. That’s what we call it. ; okay, let’s get started, shall we? ; can i talk to you? ; not now, honey.
i’ve got a lot of work to do. ; no, no, i want to talk to you. ; okay, just relax for a minute, will you, george? Yeah. ; what is it, honey? ; you have to be kidding with him. ; oh, well, carol roger, the part of stanley is is a guy who exudes animalistic sex. I mean, he’s all muscle and brawn, not [laughter] 150 lbs of silly putty.
; you can’t judge a book by its cover. ; and you can’t get blood out of a turnup. I know a few of those myself. ; give him a chance, will you? Oh, come on, kids. Shall we get started? I haven’t got too much time. I’ve only got a couple of days to whip this thing together. So, we really have to work. We really have to concentrate. All right.
Now, let’s let’s start with the really big scene first. You know, the famous torn t-shirt scene. Okay. Now, stanley, you’ve been drunk and and you’re beating her up. Yeah, but you’re sorry about it. See, you want you want a bigger forgiveness now. You’re an animal sort of a guy.
you got a raw sex appeal going for you there. Hey, uh maybe you better strip down to your t-shirt to get more of the feeling for it. Okay. ; yeah. ; okay. Now, still ; uh excuse me. ; yeah. ; uh here. ; here. What? ; right here on the on the t-shirt. ; oh, yeah. Just strip down. Just take your jacket off right over there. ; uh do you have a room or something i could change? [laughter] ; right here.
just don’t be yeah, we’re we’re all grown up. Excuse me. Okay. Now, stella, you don’t want to give in, but you can’t control yourself. You know, you really love the guy. You got a big thing going for him. And in the passionate embrace, you tear his t-shirt. You got that? ; okay, i think we can start now. Uh, george, [laughter] ; you know, uh, uh, just being rehearsal and all.
uh, did she have to tear my shirt? It’s my favorite one. [laughter] ; i’ll try to hold back. ; okay. Thank you. We’ll just kind of mark it now for that. Okay. Okay. Let’s get in our circle. Let’s concentrate. Know who we are, what we’re after, what our motivation is, what we want. Relax, carol. Come on. I see your tense. [laughter] action.
; stella. Stella, come to me, baby. [laughter] ; stop it, stanley. You’re an animal. What? Stella, come to my arms. ; oh, stan. ; wait, [laughter] watch the shirt. God, ; what? That wasn’t even close, george. I mean, stanley, i want passion. I want lust. I want desire. ; stella, come into my arms. Paper doll.
; no. No. Stand. [laughter] ; see what i mean? Good. Try it again. All right. Relax. Relax. Come on. Come on. Relax. Come on. Get into your circle. Know who you are. ; could you turn the furnace up a little bit, please? ; just think it’s a drafty place. Okay. Action. ; i’m sorry. It’s all right.
don’t go until you’re absolutely ready. [laughter] ; stella. Stella, come into my arms. ; oh, stanley. No. No. Cut. Cut. Cut. Excuse me a minute. Come [laughter] here for a sec, girl. ; honey, i think i know what the problem is. You’re embarrassed cuz i’m here, right? ; wrong. I’m embarrassed cuz i’m here.
[laughter] ; listen, i it may be subconscious on your part, but i think you’re uptight because you you can’t play a love scene in front of your husband, right? ; wrong. That has nothing to do with it. ; honey, forget i’m your husband and just do the scene. ; i’d like to forget you’re my husband. Let’s do the scene once more, kids.
come on. Let’s really give it this time. A lot of intensity, a lot of ; what’s the matter, jordan? You have to go somewhere. Oh, [laughter] ; what is it? ; uh uh. Look, this this isn’t going to work at all. Uh she just doesn’t have it. ; now, look, george, she really does have it.
i mean, you you just have to work with her a little bit more. You know what i mean? She’s just learning. She’ll get better. ; i don’t think you get blood out of a turnip. ; [bell] ; get that with you, carol. [laughter] ; oh, hi chuck. ; hi, carol. ; just got back from a flight. I thought i’d stop and say hello. ; oh, come on in. ; oh, thanks.
; oh, chuck. ; oh, hi chuck. Good evening, ; perkins. This is chuck. ; george, how do you do? Glad to know you. Nice to see you, too. Pilot, huh? Wow. Oh, yeah. Fly the big ones, i bet. Huh? ; the biggest? ; yeah. You know, they got movies and even cocktail lounges. Everything on those, don’t they? Well, we don’t have movies on my flight.
i just leave the door to the cockpit open and let the passengers watch me and the stewardises. [laughter] ; hey, look, i hope i’m not breaking anything up. ; well, as a matter of fact, ; we were just rehearsing some dumb old silly play. ; carol, a street car named desire is not a dumb old silly play. ; it certainly isn’t.
i did street car in college. ; you did? ; stella. Stella, i want my baby doll in my arms. ; [screaming] [laughter] ; i um i think i’m going to be running along. This isn’t going to work out. She’s even worse with him. So, um uh chuck. Carol. Carol. Chuck. ; he’s perfect, kid. He’s perfect. ; look, i’m not holding an audition.
; i am. Come on, chuck. Let’s do the scene where i rip your t-shirt apart. ; that’s right. ; all right. All right. All right. You can do the scene with him until i get somebody else. ; somebody else. ; you heard me. ; stanley. That man is stanley. ; forget it. He doesn’t even belong to our group. Now, quiet, please.
let’s get to work. You ready, carol? ; let’s concentrate. Let’s get into ; come under my arm. [screaming] ; did i rip your shirt? ; oh, it’s not my shirt. It’s your blouse. My clothes. ; carol, how could you behave like that [laughter] in front of me? ; behave like what? You’re the director. ; i’m also your husband.
; oh, you told me to forget about that. ; told you to forget about that with george perkins, not with that maniac. ; uh, look, sir, if it’s a blouse, i’ll be glad to pay for it. ; forget it. The play’s off. It’s canceled. Get trist and go home. [laughter] ; yes, sir. [laughter] ; gee, carol, i’m sorry i made him mad.
; well, i am too, chuck. You know, you were really great in that scene. ; i was? ; yeah. Fantastic. If you ever decide to give up being a housewife, you got a promising career ahead of you. ; was an actress? ; no, i was an airline stewardist. ; stepping. Oh, i really i i h i had it. It was ; i’m sorry. I don’t even want to do the darn playing.
; come on. I was putting you on with chuck like i always do. ; i know. I know. I know. But that’s not the problem. The problem is who am i going to get to play the part of stanley? Well, ; it’s got to be somebody. ; wait a minute. Why not me? I know the lines. I’ve studied the darn thing. Why don’t i play it? I mean, what’s wrong with the husband and wife playing a love scene together? Let’s try it.
; no. No. I’m i’m not in the mood. You watch how fast i’ll get you into the mood, baby. [laughter] ; hey, stella. Stella. Stella. [laughter] ; oh, chuck. Chuck. Chuck. ; okay, carol. ; what? ; you just ruined a great play in a mediocre marriage. ; [applause] ; hello. ; who was it? I don’t know. Didn’t say anything.
he just hung up. ; why’ they hang up? ; probably had the wrong number. ; why would someone call a wrong number at this time of night? [laughter] ; calling the wrong number any time of night. ; why would they pick this number? I don’t think they picked this number. Probably just dial got the wrong number. ; is it a signal? [laughter] ; is what a signal? Your friend that called.
[laughter] ; she’s not my friend. ; he’s not. ; no, ; but you said they didn’t say anything. ; they didn’t. ; then how do you know it’s a he? ; i don’t. ; but you just said he’s not my friend. We uh it’s just a figure of speech when you say that. See, i what i should have said was whoever it was didn’t say anything.
; why didn’t you say that? ; i don’t know. I wish i would have. ; is that part of your plan? ; [laughter] ; what plan? ; to confuse me. [laughter] ; how would i confuse you? ; very simple. You just said it was a he when it’s really a she, but then you’re saying whoever to confuse me. ; that’s confusing me.
; she who? ; don’t ask me. She’s your friend. There’s no she. That’s just just a wrong number, that’s all. ; is she pretty? ; who? ; your girlfriend. ; oh, wow. ; look, there’s no there’s no she. Somebody just dial got the wrong number. That’s all. That’s that’s all that was. ; was that a signal? Why? ; closing the window.
; i closed the window because i was cold. ; why didn’t you close the window before you got the signal on the phone? ; i wasn’t cold before i got the signal. ; it is a signal. ; look, it’s no signal. See? No. Gee, it’s the wrong number on the phone. I just closed that cuz i was cold. That’s all. I go to sleep.
Are you sure she saw that? ; what? ; the lights go on and off. ; did who see that? ; you tell me. She’s your friend. [laughter] ; martha, why don’t you just go to sleep? It’s 2:30. How did you know it’s 2:30? ; that’s what the clock says. ; or is it because she said she was going to call at 2:30? [laughter] ; who? ; the girl that’s waiting outside for your signals of closing the window and turning the lights on and off.
that’s who. ; look, there’s no girl. There’s nobody waiting or anything. That was the wrong number. Do you understand? Now, why in your wildest imagination would i want to even mess around with another woman? You know i love you. Crying out loud. Get to sleep, will you? Gosh. ; honey, i’m sorry. I guess i’m just jealous.
; well, no reason to be. I i love you now. You just you just go to sleep. I got to get up early, honey. ; i love you, too. And i’m i’m sorry. ; all right. Don’t worry. [laughter] you open that door and i’ll blow you in. [applause] [applause] thanks for watching. If this made you smile, tap that like button and subscribe.
