From Mama Mia. Welcome to Reality Recaps, the show where we break down what’s happening in the big bad world of reality TV. And right now, we’re deep diving into Married at First Sight Australia. I’m Tina Provice, and you might know me from Love Island Australia, popping up a couple of times on the franchise, and I’m a celebrity Get Me Out of Here.
So, yes, I’ve spent a lot of time inside the reality TV machine. And today, I’m joined by two people who are just obsessed as I am. I’m Laura Broadnick, host of Mamame Mia’s flagship entertainment podcast, The Spill. And I’m Tina Burke, but [laughter] now we’re going to call me TB cuz it’s two Tas. ; You heard that right. Two Tas.
I actually know no other Tas and now I work with two Tina. ; Aren’t you so [laughter] special? ; Well, we’ll think of more funny jokes as we go along with the segment every week. To give us a reprieve from what is married at first sight. So to kick off today, obviously this week we’ve met a whole bunch of people who I hope are getting some professional care on the side of this airing.
So to kick off, we’re just going to go through a few of the couples who are like, “Nice, congrats. We’ll see you again. talk to you soon. So, kicking off with one of our couples that was very nice but get an honorable mention today is Alyssa and David. If you don’t know who any of these people are, she was the blonde nurse/social manager who was very much like this is what I want.
And he was the tall rapper from Brisbane. As soon as he said Brisbane, I’m like, I see you, sir. [laughter] ; What did we think of this pairing? ; Now, at first, I wasn’t sure. I feel like in all of the teasers, they had that big moment where she was like, I can’t get married to you. Also, ; she needs an award for that acting performance.
I was I was gripped by that. It was gripping. ; Yeah, [laughter] it was it was impressive. I also like that when she sat down, they played that really sinister music like the like ; and she was just laughing and ; she was being nice. I was like, why why are we doing this to this [laughter] poor girl? I don’t know her deal, but she seems okay.
I’m assuming a producer kind of fed her that bit or or at least talked her through it because it was so kind of wellstaged. ; Oh, it was great. I I lived for that moment. ; Yeah. [laughter] And she did say, we spoke to her for MMA Mia this week and she said she actually did consider though like running away and like not marrying him if he didn’t like get along with the joke about you need to propose to me at the altar.
So it’s very good that he actually did it cuz she contemplated a runner. ; Yeah. ; Okay. So that proposal bit, what did we think? Cuz I found that super painful to watch. But then I was also very aware of the editing and that a lot of those long drawn out pauses get added in later on because they spend like what hours filming these weddings and we only see a few minutes of it.
; Yeah. I mean I do think she said she did it as a test to see like how they responded cuz she was again they love talking about how much they want banter and she was very much about she wants a little bit of banter. Um and don’t we [laughter] all who wouldn’t want that? So she said she did it as like a bit of a test to see what he would do and she didn’t love that his response was quite uncomfortable.
; I hated the response. It’s just a fun light thing. I don’t think it’s a crazy thing to want to be proposed to before you get married. ; But I also understand his point of view that maybe because it’s just tall people need to stick together. And I was like, I see you, [laughter] David. It’s already uncomfortable standing in front of these people when you’re that tall.
Like all eyes are on you. [laughter] But I think he was a bit like at first he was like, “Are you trying to kind of like make a mockery of me in front of my friends? Like make me kneel.” ; Especially after the first like prank she’s pulled. Like what’s next? Like you’re just trying to get a read of this person you literally just met.
Like I it’s understandable, but it looks like from what we’ve seen from the rest of their episodes, they’re getting along. Those two crazy kids so far. So, ; they’re quite cute. I kind of like them. I think they’re just hot people like hot people. That’s the vibe I’m picking up from them so far. ; I mean, a tail is all the time.
Shakespeare [laughter] and whatnot. ; Okay, another quickfire one. Although, I did really have a lot of feels for these two. Rachel and Steven. ; I really like Rachel’s cat. Her cat was so cute. [laughter] I paused it and I took a photo of her. ; Did you hard relate? Was What did your cat think? Does your cat watch it? He’s into it.
Yeah, we bond [laughter] over that. ; So, I’m single. ; No, I was about to say I don’t have a cat, but I very much have the energy of a cat lady, so I understand. [laughter] ; I was like, I relate, girl. So, if anyone again is not putting names to faces, Rachel, who was so lovely, um was talking about not having been in a relationship for years and being on the apps and not not working out and not having anyone in her life ever tell her she’s beautiful.
And then Steven cuz she hasn’t had like a relationship, but she said she’s been in situationship. So to have been in like to be dating and to be out in the world and never have anyone tell you you’re beautiful, that’s so evil, ; which I think is why it hit her quite hard when Steven didn’t compliment her. But I’m going to give that I’m going to give that man a bit of a pass and a grace because ; I don’t think he knows what he’s doing.
; He seemed quite scared and ; Steven doesn’t know what he’s doing. ; He seemed really scared. I like him, but I didn’t love when he was like, I’m looking for another version of mom. I thought let’s not do that. But also, let’s not lie. [laughter] He said he hangs out. ; At least he’s honest. ; He His mom was there.
[laughter] Yeah, I’d rather find that out on my at my surprise wedding than find it out later on. ; The wait is finally over. For the first time since , the El Macko range is back at Mackers. Get that unique twist you love with cool sour cream and fiery salsa. But this time, there are two new stars.
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And I was watching that first episode. I’m like, if this poor sweet woman gets destroyed by an awful man, I’m turning the show off. It’s going to have huge ramifications for my workday and I probably get fired, but I’m not what storm the capital if that happens. She needs to be protected at all costs. ; Sad with a nice guy.
And I love that that had that little talk at the wedding and kind of smoothed everything. ; Had a nice moment. ; Watch this space. ; Yeah, it’s like the only like open honest communication I’ve ever seen on maps, but they resolved it so quickly. ; It might be all you see. ; It might be the only time, but good job then. ; Enjoy it while it lasts.
Um, also Beck and Danny. Um, she was the one who talked about going through a weight loss journey and breaking off her wedding kind of like just before it was about to happen and but knowing he wasn’t the one and being and wanting to take this chance. ; Danny, [laughter] what have to say about ; he’s a geyser. ; Yeah.
; Oh, okay. ; That’s that’s how he identifies. Identify ; the listeners will know. Yeah. ; Yeah. Whole thing. ; Yeah. I was like that’s a nondescript man if I’ve ever seen one. ; Gizer British. Don’t I don’t trust him. ; Oh, that’s right. Oh, no. No. It’s all coming back to me now. All these men tell a similar sub story.
And so when he goes, “Yeah, my parents been married for years. My grandparents years.” Um I know this sounds mean. ; You got to find a woman. ; He said, “I come from a love background.” ; Okay, sir. Love’s not [laughter] love’s not hereditary. It doesn’t run through your bones, sir. ; I like that he thinks it does.
[laughter] ; Yeah. And he was like, “No, my it just matters what my parents think.” Which obviously we love a guy who loves his parents. But can I just say there’s a few parents here who have steered their children wrong. There’s some not great people in this mix. Um, so I [laughter] think that moving on to some deep dive and Scott.
So Gia is our single mom who had quite the throw down fight with her friends before they went to the wedding. ; Oh my god, they need a spin-off show. I am obsessed with ; It’s so funny that you say that because that’s exactly why they did it. I think ; that was the most stage I mean I appreciate some entertainment. That was the most staged fight I’ve ever seen.
; Yeah, they were there was actually no fight. No, ; it just kicked off on nothing. Well rehearsed one liners for the camera. ; Yeah. Especially like as in it’s her wedding and then he’s just in the living room pacing and their other friend’s not with the bride. She’s with him. She’s like, “Do you want a sandwich? Should I get you something?” And it’s like she’s like, “Do you want to stay [laughter] off you guys?” ; But it was his moment.
And I love people who take a moment. ; And I like that they know that cuz Matt has been on so long now and every time with the weddings there’s like a few standout people. Like it’s always someone’s hot brother or someone’s weird cousin and like this was his moment and he took it and he I think had rehearsed his oneliners a little bit.
; Yeah. And we love a clean delivery. Yeah. ; This is not my first rodeo. You’re not coming in the limo. And then they made up pretty quickly. ; They made up. But then they get to the wedding and she finds out it’s like a destination beach wedding. And he’s just like, “Not my dear when I first came across her.
” ; Very abrasive when she came in. And I was really surprised to find out that she was a mother because when we first introduced to her, she has not a single nice thing to say about any of the other. ; Yeah. She came in hot. She was the token mean nasty girl. But then I ended up relating to her more than anyone else on the show.
She didn’t want to walk on sand because she’s like, “Not the [laughter] beach.” And I was like, “Girl, you and I are the same. I love the beach for swimming. Walking through the sand and wind when you’re trying to look beautiful in heels.” ; Yeah. ; I wouldn’t have got out of a car. I’m impressed that she ; Yeah. ; Yeah. ; Then she met Scott, who do we like I’m just [laughter] I’m so I’m so worried about being tricked.
; I know. ; I like him, but I don’t want to say it. No. He gave well initial vibes and thoughts I’m like it’s giving like Teeu Andrew Tate like is is kind of what I saw at first like he’s in his car he’s like I’m getting up at : a.m. and I’m grinding and I swear there was like on the whiteboard someone said it online and I’m like I think I remember that it was like a whiteboard and it said like million dollar year or like [laughter] something like that just randomly written. We need to go back and find it.
; Oh no. He’s a manifesttor. That’s the worst thing a [laughter] man can be. ; He has a vision board. ; He’s got vision. ; No. Oh I can’t I can’t take a man who manifests. No. Yeah. [laughter] I don’t know how I feel about him. I liked how he how he he reacted when he found out that like she’s a single mother.
I thought that was strong, [laughter] but also like the bars in ; No, literally I’m like, “Oh, wow. We like him now because he doesn’t hate that she’s a mother.” ; Yeah. But whereas last season we saw Adrian and the way that he reacted to finding out he’d been paired with a single mother and you go, “Oh, I’m a bit scared. I’m worried for these women.
” So if they go, “Yeah, that’s okay.” You’re like, “Yay, yay.” And it’s like they just ; He turned it around for sure. I think they both did. They had a nice arc. I do think with some of these producers have gone a little bit the opposite of the tricks they’ve pulled in because with Scott and Gia like normally it would be their trick to pair a single mom with cuz Exactly.
These people get in extensive interviews, background checks, psychological checks. So when they match them together and it doesn’t work, it’s deliberate. So, their old trick would have been matching her with a guy who doesn’t want kids or is like, I want a pure wife who’s never been with anyone else. And so, [laughter] the fact that they match them together and he said like, oh yeah, I’ve dated lots of other women with kids. That’s fine.
; Kind of showed me they’re going a different way. And the same thing almost with Rachel and Steven that they paired that they paired her with someone who ; would be kind to her, at least at the start. ; Yeah, they often do pair, you’re right, those people with like just the absolute wrong man in the world.
And it’s like enrages everyone every year. But they did say this season they were like we’re getting back to our roots quote. ; I don’t know if I quite ; I don’t believe them on that. I think they’re going to do something else. But I think everyone is so concerned about being tricked and they’re going to get us when we least expect it.
; I know. That’s why it’s like trust no one. ; I feel like I’m watching a spy thriller. [laughter] Like I’m not trusting anyone. Everyone’s a liar. ; Yeah. I keep waiting for something to happen and then like nothing happens and I go oh well that was nice. [laughter] ; I I would say this show is a lot more is a lot darker than traitor in terms of like [laughter] trying to take people down. That’s okay.
Another couple that we must discuss um who might have had the most awkward wedding of all time. I’ve been to some terrible weddings in my time. If you [laughter] guys have this whole thing like weddings are so magical until you go to a bad one, right? ; Yeah. ; That’s awkward. And this one was awkward and it was Mel and Luke. ; Jesus Christ.
; So Mel is just a pretty girl who is , wants to get married. That’s ; She’s just pink energy, pink aura. She wants her blue ; and she loves romcoms. I get it. ; A that’s nice. ; That’s nice for her. And she would be nondescript except for the fact that she had a bit of disaster wedding. And then Luke is a very sweet farmer who loves his sisters which was yeah a green flag.
; I thought he was cute. Am [laughter] I just saying that because I think he’s hot? ; No, I do think he was cute but also you’re agreeing [laughter] what I’m saying but say presenting it in another way. So we like him cuz he’s cute. I think he’s cute. [laughter] I’m checking I’m checking the evidence of his photo. He is cute.
Um so these two probably had our biggest setup wedding. For sure. ; For sure. And the thing is with the with the like the right couple, this wouldn’t have been such a big deal. But obviously the producers set this up to put them on this kind of disastrous dramatic track straight away. So they’re on the way there.
Luke’s in the back of the limo with the sisters having champagne. Green flag time of his life. ; Green flag. He’s having the best time. ; Like going to the casino. ; Yeah, [laughter] that was the vibe. It was partying like crazy ; until the producer says, “Luke, you brought the rings, right? I I swear to God, no other Married at First Sight groom has ever been entrusted to do one thing.
Sometimes in the background, you see producers tying their shoelaces and ties. ; You’re the producer. You’re producing the show. You bring the rings. ; Yeah. One job. ; Yeah. I’m sure that man has never seen these rings before. [laughter] ; I would not be above suggesting allegedly that they went in and took those rings out of his [laughter] pocket, put them back on the counter.
; The way they were just placed on the counter. Like, you think that man just perfectly placed them on the counter there? ; See it? I’m not buying That man has never clocked eyes on those rings. [laughter] And then instead of getting a runner from production, which again they would have had cuz there’s like people, ; people [laughter] ; following that limo, they turn the limo around and then some producer at the wedding tells Mel to walk down the aisle and stand there for at least an hour.
I’m going to say maybe longer in the heat, which would make anyone angry. ; That’s part I just cannot wrap my head around how they thought it wouldn’t come across as stage because when you’re filming a show, you are always held in a car. You were held in a car for like hours on end.
Like I just always in a car. ; I’ve been held in a car for like hours before. So there’s ; Do they bring you snacks? Is there a bathroom? Is there a phone? ; If you need to go to the bathroom, you’re like taken out and like walked over to like a portaloo and you like have your face covered or something and then they’ll like walk you back.
I don’t [laughter] ; glamorous medium. ; So for her to like be out of the car released into the wedding to stand there for god knows how long. like so stag like they extensively yeah look into these people into the things that annoy them and I wonder if at any point in time she said like she I don’t like people who are like my biggest pet peeve is people who don’t respect my time and they went you know what would be really funny [laughter] if we sabotage her and like cuz otherwise like she seems like a lovely girl and her mom was so kind and
everyone seemed great and he does seem like he could be a good match for her but they’ve royally set them up ; to have an awful wedding day. I think she seems sweet, but we don’t really actually see much more than her just saying she’s sweet and saying she’s a princess. So, I think the true colors are how she’s reacted to this.
But, ; and it was it was poor. Like, even her own mom was like, “Okay, she’s got to get over it now.” ; Oh, yeah. The gum was annoying. He was like chewing like so slightly open. He’s like ; I’m like, [laughter] “What are you what do you what do you get that out? How is that?” ; Someone someone one of those sisters.
Can I’m just I’m not I’m not trying [laughter] to bag those girls out, but I’m just saying a real sister would have pulled that gum out of his mouth before he walked down, though. ; Oh, for sure. ; %. ; It was a plant, too. ; It was a plant. ; It was a plant with his real sisters. I don’t know.
Has anyone checked? ; And so we And that kind of did carry on for the rest of the night. ; Whole episode. Yeah. Every time you see them, she’s mad again. ; So, you would think that was the worst wedding, but I have a contender for the actual worst wedding on Married at First Sight, maybe that I’ve ever seen. ; And that is the marriage of Brooke and a man unfortunately named Chris.
Not that Chris is a bad name, but it has ruined me [laughter] forever. ; Everything about this man. So, Brooke is a model from the Gold Coast who’s looking for love. And Chris is a man who wants everyone to know he’s foot, but he doesn’t look it. ; He doesn’t look it. I was I was like, “That man’s not six foot.
” So, kudos to him for actually pulling out the ruler. Cuz [laughter] after that, I was like, “Fair it off.” ; Well, we’ve been tricked in the past. You got to be careful these days. ; Yeah. ; He just I mean, the thing is, here’s the thing about this man. ; This man, ; he’s awful. [laughter] This man wants me to hate him and this show is rage baiting me into hate him and I’m not going to give them the satisfaction cuz it’s also like he’s awful.
Well, internally I’m not, but externally well I just know exactly what they were playing at by bringing this awful man in who not only ; I’m glad he didn’t get paired with someone who ; Well, I think in the old days they would have really really I think they were probably edging us with that one. ; Exactly.
Are we going to do it? But it’s also interesting to be like, okay, here’s physically everything you wanted and you’re still not happy. But I think, yeah, he’s he’s he’s got a lot of flaws, but one of them is that he is not at all interesting or funny or and just is kind of giving and also kind of think feels like his ticket for fame is to be really difficult.
; Yeah. ; Which can only come from a man who believes he’s six foot but isn’t. ; He said so many times, I work in a male dominated field. And I’m like, babe, that only is a sympathetic. Like, you’re only going to get sympathy if you’re a woman saying the world. What are you talking about? ; Like, but that works because you’re the male.
; Yeah. And it was coming across very like he had a lot of opinions at that Bucks party. And I do think they Frankensteined that edit a bit because it seems like the other men were not happy with him, but they didn’t really show anyone kind of calling him out on it. Just like offscreen they did. So, I do wonder first of all if that happened, but second, he’s got a lot of opinions for a guy who just seems like okay.
and medium. Yeah. Like he’s there’s nothing special going on and that’s deeply mean to say, but he’s sitting there saying he would never even consider dating a fat woman. And I’m like, “Okay, buddy. No one was asking.” ; There’s nothing intrigu It’s It’s that’s this is why it’s even hard for me to hate him cuz he’s not intriguing enough.
; He’s not a good enough villain to pull off a villain edit. ; No. And you know what? ; Too bland. ; I do think last year like Elliot was a good villain off the bat ; because you knew what they were doing. They wanted you to be mad at him and he had a great time with it. And then obviously his edit flipped around later, but like if you’re going to be this villainous guy, do it.
Well, ; my friend was at the wedding. Um ; my friend was at the wedding. I um ; Your friend wasn’t one of his ; No, she was part of Brook’s party, but she said that he came across very normal. Didn’t pick up on anything weird vibes from him. No. On the day of it running out, which I think if we hadn’t seen that edit of him being ; He came across well on the wedding.
; It was No, but it was all the bits to camera. He’s like, I’m not telling producers that. I’m not saying that or like, oh, she’s all right. I guess kind of it was all that stuff. But you know what? The friend thing, this is what threw me is that one of Chris’s friends, the one who was sitting in the front row on the far side, who was like, “Yeah, the mustache man.
” Guys, do we has someone in authority got eyes on him? He was so scary. ; Well, I didn’t see him. I got because I also recognized I knew the guy sitting in the middle and I was like, “Oh, I know that guy, too.” So, I [laughter] didn’t notice that guy on the end. I’m like, “Well, I know everybody at this wedding.
Where was my invite?” ; Yeah. I have some feedback from people at this wedding. Some of them were scary as hell. [laughter] And so I The only thing I liked about this is that like it felt like that Brooke was going to be cuz when she made the joke about him being short, I was like, I love this woman.
Because that has hit him harder than anything else in his life. ; And that’s when his creepy friend was like, I can’t believe she said that. I’m like, sit down, sir. ; Yeah. I do think like cuz Chris’s parents seem pretty like normal and in love and sweet and like ; I know, but sometimes ; this is where we get tricked. These men are not normal.
Sometimes we get sometimes nice people give birth to serial killers. You can’t always [laughter] trace the line. But if I was also at this wedding, I would think like normal vibes because yeah, he said a lot of off camera, but on camera at the wedding, I thought he actually came across really well. And even when like she didn’t want to kiss him, he his reaction even when she wasn’t there was like, “Well, I guess we’ll kiss one day.
I don’t mind.” Like he had a good reaction to that. Given the things he said, I didn’t think he would. ; I think she’s also coming across like quite good. Like we don’t actually see too much. I don’t think we seen the whole of her yet. Yeah. So, I’m excited to see their dynamic and I kind of hope she’s going to put him in his place a little bit.
; Stomps that man. But ; it is. Yeah. But it’s it’s good TV and like I’ve been to a math wedding. I’m sure your friend would have told you like they get to the end of the aisle and they stand there and the cbrant says nothing. ; They stand there and the cbrant just stares at them and it’s so that they get those awkward moments.
That’s probably why she made the comment about height because they just stand there and they like look at each other and they go, “Oh, should we talk now? What do we do?” And the celebrant will literally stare at them, be completely and utterly silent for like minutes, and then just be like, “Okay, let’s go.” And then they film it a second time.
; Wait, so is he not foot? [laughter] ; I think he isn’t foot. ; These are the mysteries to unravel. ; More to come on. ; If a man can be so brutally hurt by someone saying like questioning his height, then he’s ; hate fat people. ; Yeah, exactly. That’s a much bigger red flag.
talking about women just generally the way he was and how dumb the experts were. I’m sorry. They’re actually psychologists and doctors. Thank you very much, Chris. [laughter] ; I I don’t know if we can go as far to defend. ; Yeah, I don’t think I’m going to die on that hill. ; I will defend Alisandra. That’s not my dying day. [laughter] ; Okay.
Well, that’s going to be a debate for another day. All right. Well, thank you so much for listening to our first reality recap of the Merit at First Sight season. And we will do this again next week with more trauma and maybe love, [laughter] but mostly trauma. Mostly trauma.
